The Evil Tongue

The talk about third [persons] kills three persons: him who tells [the slander], him who accepts it, and him about whom it is told.
-Arachin 15b

R. Johanan said on the authority of R. Simeon b. Yohai: Verbal wrong is more heinous than monetary wrong, because of the first it is written, 'and thou shalt fear thy God,' but not of the second. R. Eleazar said: The one affects his [the victim's] person, the other only his money. R. Samuel b. Nahmani said: For the former restoration is possible, but not for the latter. . . . A tanna recited before R. Nahman b. Isaac: He who publicly shames his neighbour is as though he shed blood. Whereupon he remarked to him, 'You say well, because I have seen it [sc. such shaming], the ruddiness departing and paleness supervening.'
-Baba Metzia 58b

The Holy One, blessed be He, said to the tongue: All members of the human body are standing, you are lying; all members of the human body are outside, you are guarded inside; not only that, but I surrounded you with two walls, one of bone and one of flesh; 'What shall be given unto thee, what shall be done more unto thee, thou deceitful tongue'!
-Arachin 15b

Happy he who was brought up in the Torah and whose labour was in the Torah and who has given pleasure to his Creator and who grew up with a good name and departed the world with a good name; and of him Solomon said: A good name is better than precious oil, and the day of death than the day of one's birth.
-Berachoth 17a

Commentary: We probably hurt more people in this world through careless talk and malicious gossip than by any other method. How easy and how enticing it is to us to pass on some juicy bit of gossip to the next person! And yet at the same time, how demeaning that information often is to the person being discussed. As the passages above indicate, the tongue is one of the more difficult parts of our being to control, and the damage that it can inflict upon someone's good name is irreparable. A good rule of thumb is to never say anything about a person that you would not be willing to say in front of them. Personally, I don't control my own tongue to perfection, but as I get older, I do become increasingly aware of the thoughtlessness of some of my words. Hence, if you accomplish nothing else, at least learn to control your tongue!